The Inkblots (2017)

I enrolled in college as a psychology major, not because it was a way to be undecided without bring actually undecided but because I really enjoyed psychology. While I didn’t take psychology in high school, I self-studied for the AP Psychology exam and got a 5 because I absolutely devoured the material. My dad works in psychology and is the person who exposed me to the field. As a result, I’ve long had a deep interest in the workings of the human mind and the rigorous scientific study of it. (The scientific method is your best friend, folks!)

The Rorschach test is pretty famous. You probably know it as the symmetrical ink blot that shrinks show to people, drawing conclusions about their mental state based on what these crazies see in the amorphous shapes. You may even know the name from the character in The Watchmen, whose mask shows a symmetrical, always-changing pattern of black shapes.

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This guy right here.

Author Damion Searls set out to write The Inkblots:Hermann Rorschach, His Iconic Test, and the Power of Seeing because there was no definitive Rorschach biography, despite the huge impact that his inkblots have had on psychology and pop culture. I’ve known about the Rorschach for a long time, primarily as a pop psych test that is fun to do and fun to get results from, but ultimately not that reliable. I learned that this perception of the inkblot test comes not from the original test that Hermann Rorschach spent his life developing but from generations of people not giving the test correctly and letting politics get in the way of psychology.

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The first half of the book is a great biography of Hermann Rorschach. First of all, look at him: he looks like a combination of Karl Urban and Brad Pitt and he lived during the golden age of psychology. His contemporaries were Freud and Jung, two of the biggest names in psychology to this day, and wrote letters to Tolstoy. He was just this extraordinarily brilliant mind who placed high value on art and the human part of the human mind. While many psychologists and psychiatrists of the time saw patients as just patients, Rorschach never lost sight of the humanity of his work. Born into a family of artists, he was extremely in tune with how art affected people and how perceptions reflected the condition of the mind.

Honestly, it was really inspiring to read about this man who was likely a genius and definitely ahead of his time with his approaches to the study of the mind, interacting with patients, and using art for therapy. Searls paints a very flattering portrait of Rorschach as a man who was raised at the juncture of an artistic family and Russian thought, a man whose brilliance was only magnified by his great compassion for the minds who needed his help the most, a man who was able to see patterns and draw conclusions that would not be confirmed until decades later when science was able to catch up.

It was a bit of a shock when he passed away halfway through the book, to say the least. By that point, I had become so attached to Hermann Rorschach, his loving family, his patients and his colleagues, and of course, the inkblots that were the culmination of all the experiences of his life (as highlighted by the book). Turning the page and finding that Dr. Rorschach had suddenly died hit hard, and as a reader, I was left scrambling to pick up the pieces while the inkblot test remained in motion, just as the world was left trying to figure out what to make of the inkblots before Rorschach was able to publish about them.

If you thought Rorschach’s biography was fascinating, the timeline of the Rorschach inkblots as they relate to psychology over the decades was incredible. I have been really enjoying these non-fiction books where I can explore a field over time, like cellular biology and quantum physics, and The Inkblots is no exception. Learning about how the Rorschach test became a test, was changed in execution and perception as it traveled from one practitioner to another, from one clinic to another, from lecture hall to student, and back around again… The politics that surrounded the 10 inkblots as different camps emerged in the attempt to uncover the best way to utilize the Rorschach, how best to help patients, how best to get accurate results.

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Card I of the Rorschach inkblots. What do you see?

I closed this book with an enormous newfound respect for Hermann Rorschach, whose brilliant mind was tragically taken from the world with his early death at a time when he was poised to change it drastically. I also took away a new respect for the Rorschach inkblots in their design and original intent and execution. The inkblots seem very random, but in fact, Rorschach agonized over perfecting their abstract forms. And he got incredible results showing those inkblots to patients and to other clinicians, who were seeing the same amazing results. It’s just that, over time, as people were not trained properly in how to administer the inkblots, the reliability of the test went way down, and so did the esteem of these humble inkblots.

I highly, highly recommend this book if you are a lover of science, psychology, art, and the nexus of the 3.

Disclosure: I received a copy of this book from Blogging for Books in exchange for my honest review.

Headaches

Hello all and happy Saint Patrick’s Day if you are observing!

I’ve been having a really incredible March so far, not least of all because DC had its first actual snowstorm a week before the vernal equinox, aka the first day of spring!

And maybe that’s why I’ve been having a lot of headaches. Allergies? I’ve always been prone to headaches, usually with my monthly cycle and occasionally outside of that, but lately it’s been an almost daily throbbing pain in my head.

I saw a doctor about it and she recommended I take a few supplements to see if that helps, so I’ve added magnesium and riboflavin vitamins to my routine and am hoping for the best. I have definitely been feeling out of sorts of late, but there are so many good things happening this month. I saw Christine last weekend in San Francisco and I get to see her next weekend here in DC, with her birthday sandwiched in between during this weekend!

Posts to look forward to for the rest of the month:

  • At least two movie reviews (I saw two these week, so those will be going up very soon)
  • Any lingering China posts
  • San Francisco posts
  • Christine in DC posts

And if somehow that doesn’t fill March, I have even more drafts ready to go for my experience with Blue Apron and ClassPass (crazy, I know) so keep an eye out for all these things!

But in the meantime, if you have any suggestions for how you manage headaches and migraines, they would be very welcome. Thanks!

Lent 2017

Happy Mardi Gras, Fat Tuesday, Shrove Tuesday, and Pancake Day to any and all who are observing!

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Although I am not Catholic, I have been observing Lent in my own way for the past few years. Lent is the third time at the beginning of the year that I check in on how I am doing with my self-improvement (with my New Year’s resolutions and Chinese New Year reflections being the first two). I take a look at a bad habit that I really want to address and abstain from it. Completely.

I’m the kind of person who has a difficult time doing my vices in moderation. I had to quit chips for an entire year in order to get myself to stop eating them by the family-sized-bag-ful.

In fact, giving up chips was a Lenten initiative a few years ago. (Before I sank into chip addiction and had to give it up without waiting for Lent to come back around.) Lent has been a great way for me to seriously tackle habits of mine. And it works. Really well.

  • I actually struggle to inhale chips the way I used to.
  • I don’t watch nearly as much television as I used to, and I am a child who was partially raised by television. I used to keep time based on when my shows were on. Luckily, I was too lazy to catch up on 6 weeks of shows for the multitude of shows that I was watching in 2015, and I haven’t caught up since. It’s a little crazy to think about how addicted I was to watching all of my shows and think about how lazy I am now with regards to television.
  • I blog on a regular basis now, thanks in part to attempting to do so regularly during Lent.

This year, I wasn’t sure what to give up for Lent until last week. I have been trying to work out and be more active. Along with that, I’m also trying to eat a bit healthier. But I did have a pretty bad day where I ate the leftovers of an appetizer sampler that consisted of mozzarella sticks, chicken tenders, and onion rings.

Basically, I inhaled a bunch of deep-fried food. And I felt absolutely sick to my stomach afterwards. Regardless of how healthily you are or aren’t eating, I think that eating that much fried food in 2 minutes will make you want to throw up.

So I decided it wouldn’t be a terrible idea for me to give up fried food for Lent this year.

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Goodbye, deliciousness.

I don’t feel as apprehensive about Lent this year as I have in past years, like when I was giving up McDonald’s and chips, or when I gave up television but had to let myself have 3 shows to stay keep me company.

However, I do realize this will be a challenge. Many of my favorite foods are deep-fried:

  • Potato chips! (Goodbye again, my loves.)
  • Yeast doughnuts! (Cake ones are fine, but those fluffy yeast ones are where it’s at.)
  • Chicken McNuggets! (You know what’s better than 20 for $5? 40 for $9.)
  • French fries! (’nuff said.)

But I think that going without these deep-fried bits of deliciousness for 40 days and change (I didn’t know that Lent doesn’t include the Sundays when I started out) will be good for me.

I will also be abstaining from swear words during Lent. I prefer not to swear at all, and yet somehow I wind up doing more and more of it until the next year’s Lenten period rolls around. So this year, no swearing during Lent and hopefully none afterwards either!


Do you give up anything for Lent?
What’s a vice you need to cut back on, if you’re more of a moderation
person?

Bit Burned Out

I am just a few days away from being on-schedule for one full calendar year! If you had told me in February of 2016 that I would be posting Tuesday/Friday every week (except for the weeks where I attempted Monday/Thursday) for an entire year, I would’ve laughed because I have never been that regular with blog posting in my long blogging life.

There are a lot of posts I have brewing in my head, and I want to share them with you so badly. There are many more China travel posts, the Europe posts I swear to everything are in my head ready to be put to keyboard soon, more general posts, etc.

But I’m experiencing a bit of burnout.

I’m not sure why. I don’t think work has been particularly stressful or high-pressure. I was with my family for 2 weeks in China before coming back.

And yet, ever since getting back, I’ve felt very off. The simplest way for me to describe it is that I’m mentally exhausted. The current political climate does not help at all, but I just desperately want to turn off my brain. I actually started working out in January, and I think I’ve been throwing myself into that because I can do something that feels productive without thinking much at all. Then I go to work sore, unmotivated, unable to concentrate, unwilling to eat.

Even when I socialize with people, the textbook extrovert I tend to be, I’m only half there. I hear how fake my laugh sounds. Whereas I always have a hard time ending a conversation, I find myself wondering how much longer I can keep one up before I just stop being able to. I feel like it shows in my face, that the conversations are wearing me down from my already worn-down state.

My head hurts often and so does my belly. I’m lethargic and sleepy, and I don’t think it’s just because of how early I’m waking up to work out. I’m breaking out. I’m gaining weight. I’m taking a long time to recover from exercise.

So I will make it to one calendar year, but I will need to take a break after that post. Blogging on schedule has been really great for me and for this blog. NOt only do I have that great aesthetic pattern on my WordPress calendar but it’s good to write twice a week. Nowadays, though, I’ve been scrambling to put together low-quality posts the morning of my deadlines and I hate putting out these bad posts for you. I hate that this has become a burden and not a fun outlet.

I’ll be taking a little break very soon, and I hope I find my way back to normal soon and can finish sharing all the things I was so excited to share with you all just a few weeks ago.

I apologize in advance if post quality continues to be lower over the next few posts, but I hope the break will fix that.


Do you have any tips for burnout?

Also, I really want to stress that it’s important to stay active and woke and call your representatives and remember that you are a part of history regardless of what you do or don’t do but you can help make history if you are active about it. This applies no matter where you fall on the political spectrum, I encourage even those of you whose views differ from mine to stay informed and stay active. I will always defend your right to do so.

Sick Day Stream of Consciousness

Hi all,

I am still more under-the-weather than I thought I’d be, so my blog post isn’t quite ready for you just yet.

Just wanted to check in and say hi and maybe say a few things.

  1. Have you seen La La Land and, if so, what did you think? I liked it, but it was not as amazing as I was led to think it would be going in. People overhyped it and I thought there was a lot of room for improvement. That being said, I will never be mad watching Ryan Gosling return to his dancing roots.
  2. I haven’t watched the newest episode of Sherlock yet, please no spoilers.
  3. While I was sick last week, I watched the entire Star Wars prequel trilogy for the first time. (I watched The Phantom Menace in theaters when it came out and fell asleep, I was pretty young…) Would you be interested in me including just every movie I see in a year-end recap or is the new releases of the year enough? Currently, the new releases recap excludes, for example, if I see a December release in January of the following year.
  4. Should I start watching the Korean drama that DramaFever has been promoting on Facebook so hard???
  5. My coworker offered to teach me to lift on Wednesday morning and now I’m so scared, that pride thing may be the death of me. (Also 7:30AM?)
  6. Still a bit jetlagged because I slept through so much of my sick days that I wasn’t able to adjust as efficiently as I usually do. Yesterday morning I woke up at 2:30AM and just never went back to sleep, instead opting for a day full of activities to celebrate my company’s 15th anniversary.

How are you doing? Is 2017 treating you well so far?