Jenn: You’re wearing a lot of red today.
What I should’ve said: Yeah, I love wearing red, it’s one of my favorite colors.
What I actually said: Red signals fertility, so I’m just making sure everyone knows I’m fertile.
What I also said when I should’ve stopped: Yeah, my body is ready. Not for anyone here, but just in case anyone was wondering. It’s ready.

Sometimes, I don’t bother filtering my thoughts when I talk.
But I really ought to be filtering my thoughts 98% of the time. 😛